Today I was at work talking to a coworker about possibly asking a guy out. We were talking and he was like “If you’re going to ask him out or talk to him you have to stop being so awkward”
This is triggering for a couple reasons. First is that if I was to go out with any guy they would have to be okay with my awkwardness and who I really am. I think if the foundation of anything is started on pretending then that’s not healthy.
Secondly and more importantly, when I explained to him that my awkwardness is attached to my BPD and anxiety and that it’s not something I choose, his response was “that’s not a real thing” and “you can choose how you feel”
How can someone just tell you that your illness isn’t real.