I can’t make it through the day without crying. I just spent the last 5 days of so packing up my life and moving to Colorado. It sure has been an experience. And a bad one at that. As a Texas native I was excited to me moving for the first time to somewhere a bit cooler and less humid. And I’ve visited Colorado many times before.
But from packing being a disaster, to getting a late start, driving a Uhual cross country and when you get there finding out all your stuff wont fit in the apartment you rented from another state. I got here and the first thing I experienced was altitude sickness, I also had my whole body swell up like a potato- god only knows why, and then forced mothers day plans to the zoo when I got heat exhaustion.
All these things alone would be triggers to just want to curl up and die, but together I’m miserable. Not to mention I moved in with my brother who thinks all my chronic illnesses are fake and the doctors are lying to me and I feel fine and that I’m not trying hard enough. When I’m trying as hard as possibly can to even breathe.
Anyways, I know moving is always hard, and even harder with someone with my background. But I was so excited and now I can’t make it an hour without crying and wanting to drive back to Texas.
It’s impossible to make a fresh start when you feel like shit and no one believes your invisible illnesses are real. And everyone says I just an feeling homesick, but I don’t miss anyone. I don’t miss my house. I just couldn’t handle this much change and stress all at once and I want to go back to what I’m used to.