Hi there, I’m not exactly sure what I hope to gain from this journey I have decided to take. But I’m happy you’re along for the ride. Well if there’s anyone there. I’ve never been a big writer or journaler… (is that even a word?), partly because I never thought I was good enough, and partly because I never thought I had anything to say. And I also don’t really know how blogs work, but I’ll try my hardest.
A little about myself: as you may have guessed I have BPD. Those of you who don”t know what BPD stands for: it’s Borderline personality disorder. You see, the thing with BPD is it never comes alone, it comes with a whole gang of monstery mental health friends. Accompanying my BPD is PTSD, Major Depressive Disorder, Insomnia and Plain old anxiety. This makes it really hard to make it through any given day, and some days I just don’t want to make it through anymore.
All I know is that I have been feeling really lonely lately and I’m looking for SOMETHING-ANYTHING to make me feel again. Sure I have friends and family that know what’s going on, but do they understand? I know they try, but if they’re not going through it that’s always going to be a connection we can’t make. I have decided to make some big changes in my life, I don’t know if it’s all in attempt to “feel felt” or just to feel anything at all.
I hope along this ride I will be able to share my daily accomplishments and struggles hopes and fears. I don’t know who is reading and if this helps you in any way, sometimes I know it helps just to know you’re not alone. That’s it for tonight, I hope in time we are able to help each other make it through another day.